Discover how to transform your relationships from within.
A client once told me:"My partner doesn’t make me happy anymore. They don’t give me what I need."
This thought, although common, can be the source of much frustration and suffering. According to A Course in Miracles, no external relationship can give us the happiness that we can only find within ourselves.
Placing the weight of our happiness on someone else is a recipe for failure. We search outside for what can only be found inside, which is exactly what the ego wants—to distract us from our true source of happiness and create separation.
The Most Common Mistake in Relationships
The most common mistake is believing that our partner should fill our inner voids or make us happy all the time. This belief disconnects us from our essence and leads to unrealistic expectations that inevitably end in frustration.
The truth is that true love doesn’t ask, it doesn’t demand. It doesn’t come from lack but from fullness. It is a natural extension of the peace and unity that already exists within us.
When we expect someone else to "complete" us, we give away our power and forget that the peace and love we seek are always within us.
What Blocks True Love?
Emotions like fear, resentment, and judgment act as barriers that hide the love within us. These emotions separate us from others and keep us trapped in patterns of suffering.
A key step to reconnecting with that inner love is to let go of these emotions, freeing up the necessary space for love and peace to flourish again.
How to Transform Your Relationships from Within
Here are some steps to begin this process:
1️⃣ Recognize your expectations: Notice if you are looking for validation, security, or happiness from your partner—things you can only give yourself.
2️⃣ Refocus on inner love: Take a few minutes each day to connect with the peace within you. Repeat affirmations like:“I choose the love that is already within me. I choose peace.”
3️⃣ Release the emotions blocking you using the RIE Method:
Recognize the emotion you are feeling (fear, resentment, judgment, etc.).
Identify where you feel it in your body (a knot in your throat, pressure in your chest, tension in your stomach).
Eliminate the emotion by feeling it fully, without judging or analyzing it, until it naturally dissolves.
4️⃣ Extend love instead of demanding it: When you are at peace with yourself, love flows naturally toward others. You no longer need it; you simply share it.
Remember:
True love cannot be found outside. It is within you, waiting to be recognized. When you connect with this truth and let go of what is blocking you, all your relationships will change.
Do you relate to this?
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